We tried to warn you.

We really did.
But CYKOSISmusic.com has officially reached critical mass, and the fallout is beautiful. Streams aren’t climbing anymore; they’re in low-earth orbit.

NASA just issued a statement confirming that certain satellites have begun picking up sub-bass frequencies strong enough to register on seismographs. One technician in French Guiana reportedly asked, “Is this an earthquake or new CYKOSIS?” It’s new CYKOSIS.

The entire discography is now spinning at a collective 180 BPM across every platform, even the lo-fi chillhop playlists are scared. SoundCloud’s servers requested hazard pay. Spotify wrapped up early this year because it didn’t want to be emotionally unprepared for what CYKOSIS is about to do to 2025 Wrapped.

Real-world sightings are getting out of hand:

• Your ex legally changed her name to “CYKO’s #1” and got the logo tattooed on her passport photo.
• Your mom’s ringtone is now track 4 (“Mom Said It’s My Turn On The Rig”) and she does the finger-guns every time it rings in the grocery store.
• A dude in Portugal proposed to his girlfriend by rigging his car subs to play the second drop of “Hi My Name Is Cyko” when she opened the ring box. She said yes before the snare even hit.
• At least seven Chihuahuas have started headbanging in slow-motion videos. Animal behaviorists are calling it “unprecedented but adorable.”

The CYKOSIS website itself has become a place of pilgrimage.

Refresh it at your own risk: the bass hits so hard on load-in that three people have reported their smartwatches congratulating them for finishing a HIIT workout they never started.

Merch sold out in 11 minutes.

Restock sold out in 7.

Someone is currently reselling a single black hoodie on eBay for the price of a used Civic, and the bidding war has its own Discord server.

Bottom line: the takeover is complete.

Resistance is futile.

Your playlist will be assimilated.

Welcome to the new world order, measured in wobs per minute.

Turn it up, tell your mom I said hi, and brace for impact.

Listen to CYKOSIS Music Now
We didn’t break the internet.
We just taught it how to mosh.